Waiting For Class.

I'm sitting here in these nasty chairs on the 3rd floor of the Kopp building waiting for my math class. I just met John, here who is in my math class as well. He commented on the chairs, introduced himself and sat rather close with his foot on the same table as my feet. I just realized, or remembered, how horrible I am with meeting new people or talking to people in general. I can never say the right thing. I meet my favorite band- I choke up and say, "Hi," "Good" and, "Thank you" all in the same high pitched voice that does not belong to me. I go to the checkout at Zumiez- they ask "What's up?" and I reply, "Good." I've got some verbal/vocal problem.

I have no problem if the other person is more talkative than I am, but you cannot expect me to start or keep a conversation going. It's sad. So that's why I sit here, on my laptop with earbuds in. So people don't bother me and I don't have to make a fool of myself. Voila. I'm isolating myself from the world!

(insert 5 minutes of painful things.)

I went to check facebook, because I'm like that, and I saw my friend Simon posted something 7 minutes ago. I checked the chat frantically to see if he was still on. He wasn't. I checked if he poked me. He didn't. It sucks. He doesn't get online very often and usually when he does I hear how he's doing, but not lately. He's fallen out of touch and I don't want to let go. I sincerely miss talking to him. I can't call him because he lives in London. That's costly.

I also saw a post by TFK about the Creation Fest Tour and went to check the date again- just to make sure. The date for Iowa is no longer listed. You could say I'm crushed. FM Static is touring as well and I've waited so long to hear them and now... it's just taken away from me.

I feel robbed. Robbed of my friendship. Robbed of my music. Robbed of my sanity.

I slept in this morning and missed my once a week reading class. It's ironic that last night I was getting upset that it was half online and half classroom because now I'm thankful for it. I am still upset. I went from an okay mood to spiraling downward.

This. Just. Sucks.

I'm going to my math class now. Live on without me, world.